Humor

Download E-books How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack: Defend Yourself When the Lawn Warriors Strike (And They Will) PDF

By Chuck Sambuchino

Move over zombies and adolescent vampires.
 
There’s a brand new chance in town—and it’s merely twelve inches tall. How to outlive a backyard Gnome assault is the single finished survival consultant that can assist you hinder, organize for, and push back an impending domestic invasion by way of the typical backyard gnome. as soon as considered innocuous backyard undefined, proof is mounting that those smiling garden statues are poised and able to smash havoc. the chance is genuine. And it’s here.    
   category 1 gnome-slayer and gnome safety specialist Chuck Sambuchino has built a confirmed system—Assess, guard, shield, Apply—for safeguarding estate, possessions, and family. ideas comprise step by step directions for gnome-proofing the common living, spotting and examining the symptoms of a meeting hoard, and—in the development secured perimeter is breached—confronting and scuffling with the attackers at shut variety.

Show description

Download E-books Nein. A Manifesto PDF

By Eric Jarosinski

#FrequentlyAskedQuestions
1. Ontology: what the fuck?
2. Causality: why the fuck?
3. Epistemology: how the why the fuck?
4. Phenomenology: the fuck.

Nein. A Manifesto is the brainchild of Eric Jarosinski, the self-described “failed highbrow” at the back of the highly well known @NeinQuarterly, a “Compendium of Utopian Negation” that makes use of the aphoristic strength of Twitter to plumb the existential abyss of recent life—and reveals it bottomless.

Stridently hopeless and charmingly dour, Nein. A Manifesto is an irreverent philosophical research into our such a lot pressing questions. And the least. encouraged via the aphorisms of Nietzsche, Karl Kraus, Walter Benjamin, and Theodor W. Adorno, Jarosinski’s short-form type reinvents philosophy for an international doomed to distraction.

Nein. A Manifesto might be packaged as an enticing small-format hardcover, with a handful of Jarosinski’s aphorisms laid out on every one web page. severe thinkers, fanatics of language, bibliophiles, manics and depressives alike might be interested in this compelling, witty, and infrequently hilarious translation of electronic into print. concept into praxis. And tragedy into farce.

Show description

Download E-books Le huitième sortilège (Les annales du Dique-monde, Tome 2) PDF

By Terry Pratchett

« Vous auriez de très jolis pieds si vous en preniez soin, dit los angeles vierge Bethan. — Ch’est bien aimable à toi, répondit Cohen le Barbare. Mais des pédicures j’en rencontre pas chouvent dans ma profechion. » Octogénaire, borgne, chauve, édenté, Cohen, le plus grand héros de tous les temps réussira-t-il à tirer Deuxfleurs et Rincevent des griffes de leurs poursuivants ? motor vehicle une étoile rouge threat de percuter le Disque-monde, dont l. a. survie repose sur le sorcier calamiteux : dans son esprit brumeux se tapit le Huitième Sortilège... Avec une distribution prestigieuse dans les seconds rôles : le Bagage, l’In-Octavo, Herrena l. a. Harpie, Kwartz le troll, Trymon l’enchanteur maléfique et, naturellement los angeles Mort. Une aventure fantastique sans précédent. Ou peut-être une gigantesque fumisterie, plus encore que l. a. Huitième Couleur.

Show description

Download E-books The Portlandia Cookbook: Cook Like a Local PDF

By Fred Armisen, Carrie Brownstein, Jonathan Krisel

The significant other cookbook to the hit express Portlandia by means of the Emmy-nominated stars and writers Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein, with 50 scrumptious recipes for each nutrients lover, freegan, natural farmer, and meals truck diehard.

Food performs a truly targeted function in Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein’s award-winning satire Portlandia. Here are recipes for the dishes that outline the exhibit, from cult-raised fowl and Stu’s stews to pickled greens and foraged eco-friendly salads. whole with new full-color entire nutrition images and illustrations, funny tales and sidebars from the loveable food-obsessed Portlandia characters (such as Mr. Mayor, Peter and Nance, and Colin the chicken), and recommendation on how one can decide upon a mattress and breakfast and behave at a communal desk, this can be a humorous cookbook—with severe recipes—for someone who loves meals. And sure, the chicken’s neighborhood.

Show description

Download E-books Undisputed: How to Become the World Champion in 1,372 Easy Steps PDF

By Chris Jericho

The eagerly awaited follow-up to the New York occasions bestselling A Lion's Tale records Chris Jericho's meteoric upward push to wrestling glory within the WWE.

A Lion's Tale gave readers a portrait of Jericho as a tender guy. battling his method via Mexico, rinky-dink leagues and a battery of thieving, sleazy promoters/managers, the e-book ended with the author's WWE (World Wrestling leisure) debut. by no means one to go away his enthusiasts putting, as established via his fresh go back to wrestling glory, Jericho now tells the tale of existence within the vast leagues. yet "making it" within the finest wrestling league on the earth comes with its personal set of stumbling blocks and difficult classes. Jericho, in his witty, hilarious, and strangely endearing demeanour, lays all of it out: the great, the undesirable, and the spandex.

Show description

Download E-books I'm Not Gonna Lie: and Other Lies You Tell When You Turn 50 PDF

By George Lopez

From the most celebrated and cherished comedians and actors of our time, George Lopez, comes this hilarious, touching, and sometimes wacky chronicle of existence after fifty.
 
George Lopez simply hit the half-century mark and the reset button on his lifestyles. Newly unmarried and able to include lifestyles, George was once excited to show fifty. it might be a welcome new section in his lifestyles, an opportunity to claim so long to a decade that integrated a kidney transplant and a divorce. but if he appeared round a room packed with his adolescence pals, all accrued to have a good time his birthday, many now bald or obese, it by surprise hit him that he was once old.
 
What occurred? And extra importantly, what was once he going to do approximately it? George learns the challenging method that after you switch 50, every little thing alterations. You pull a muscle on your sleep. You stay away from mirrors in any respect bills, and regularly, always put on a gown. you might want to time table an appointment to have intercourse. you need to dye your hair and purchase a bath with a door.
 
As George learns to embody existence after fifty, he invitations readers into his international, sharing the ups and downs of having older—from his courting with a far more youthful girl to a strange consultation with a puppy psychic, to a visit behind-the-scenes at his tumultuous years at Lopez Tonight, to an intimate examine his sacred flooring, the golfing course—and, for the 1st time, he unearths in relocating element, the tale of the conflict for his lifestyles opposed to kidney sickness.  
 
I’m no longer Gonna Lie  will make you laugh at your self, cry about your self, and examine turning fifty in a manner you by no means would’ve imagined—through the eyes of George Lopez.

Show description

Download E-books Fifty Shades of Louisa May: A Memoir of Transcendental Sex PDF

By L. M. Anonymous

Through the contemporary renovations of the Orchard condo in harmony, Massachusetts—home of the famed Alcott family—workmen repairing rotting beams came upon a handwritten manuscript tightly rolled right into a bottle and buried within the earthen flooring of what was the foundation cellar. Conservators from Harvard University’s Peabody Museum date the manuscript from the overdue 1800s. even if the identify web page bears no signature, there should be no doubt of its authenticity or its author.

The textual content, released for the 1st time, will doubtless offend scholars—while shooting the prurient mind's eye of many readers. The author’s actual goal is misplaced to us, shop for tricks all through suggesting that scripting this mémoire d’amour served as a cathartic workout. purely the manuscript continues to be, and it's provided in unexpurgated shape here.

Louisa may perhaps Alcott, writer of the vintage Little ladies, consort of Emerson, Thoreau and Hawthorne, liked icon of professors of yankee 19th-century literature and maybe much less enjoyed via their legions of scholars, had a lusty aspect that used to be much less educational, and extra . . . transcendental than any people knew.

Brilliantly penned through a widely known author who prefers the cloak of anonymity to the vulgar embody of impolite repute (of which s/he has no need), this hilarious little ebook finds the unbridled passion-that-might-have-been of 1 of the world’s most well-liked authors.

A vividly written tome that simply may well let us know extra in regards to the sowing of transcendental wild oats than any ream of volumes at the topic, Fifty colours of Louisa may perhaps isn't for the susceptible of artwork, or in case you desire their literary icons less than glass. It imagines an unhinged Melville doing what comes certainly, a Centennial Ball in contrast to any heretofore defined, Louisa May’s ardent encounters along with her “Wooden Friend,” and masses, even more.

Show description

Download E-books I'd Rather We Got Casinos: And Other Black Thoughts PDF

By Larry Wilmore

From the host of Comedy Central's The Nightly express with Larry Wilmore comes the 1st paperback reprint of his humorous and provocative musings on race in the United States and different topics.

I'd particularly We bought Casinos And different Black Thoughts stocks Wilmore's hilarious, eye-opening reviews on arguable issues. via numerous literary kinds resembling op-ed items, epistolary entries, and long-lost transcripts, he tackles the mundane and the taboo, together with: why black weathermen make him think satisfied (or sad); why brothas do not see UFOs; indignant black church publications; and his frustration with Black historical past Month--after all, can twenty-eight days of trivialities particularly make up for hundreds of years of oppression?

Show description